The Good Read (or, What Makes a Book Good)

I came across the beginning of this spectacular book review by Susanna Sonnenberg of the San Francisco Chronicle. In it she defines what makes a book a good read.

Before you read it, I want you to substitute your name for the author, Karen Thompson Walker, and the title of your book instead of hers, which is The Age of Miracles.

Here it is:


"What do we ask of a good read? Escape, release, characters to believe in, situations that convince us, especially fantastic ones. We must be compelled from one page to the next at a pace that feels just right--not too fast, never slow. Often the good read is cinematic, suggesting the inevitable movie. Karen Thompson Walker has suffused her first novel, The Age of Miracles, with these qualities, and if you begin this book, you'll be loath to set it down until you've reached its end.

What, in turn, does the good read ask of us? Surrender.

I surrendered on page 7."

Books, Shakespeare and Company Bookstore, The Latin Quarter, Paris

http://www.freefoto.com/imagelink/?ffid=1351-06-2&s=s

There, now you have it. The perfect review that perfectly sums up (in my opinion) what we, as readers, desire most in a book.

Now we, as writers, simply need to go out and write that!!! Easy-peasy, right???

The RIGHT Kind of Conflict--from James Frey

I'm on vacation reading James Frey's How to Write a Damn Good Novel as I stare at the Atlantic Ocean. Life is always better when you can stare at an ocean all day!

Conflict, conflict, conflict. That's the ticket to success. We need it in every scene, the kind that impedes our character's goals.

Frey talks about the criticalness of conflict and how it uncovers the nuances of character. Here's what he has to say (see pages 39-43 of How to Write a Damn Good Novel):

• "First, plan your novel with rising conflict always in mind. Your characters should be facing ever-increasing obstacles, their problems should be multiplying, pressures on them should always be growing. As the conflict rises, the character changes.
• The kind of conflict we want is RISING conflict. This means the conflict is developed in a nuanced way to show the character slowly and subtly going from one level of emotional intensity up the scale to another. Frey says, for example, the character can begin being annoyed then progress through the scene to peevishness to mild anger to insane anger. What he's saying is, the better a writer you are, the better you are at making these subtle changes which show the reader the many facets of character.
• The character is fully revealed because the reader has seen her or him acting and reacting at each emotional level. The reader becomes gripped in the slowly rising conflict.

So how can you tell if you have rising conflict? Frey says you should look at your character's emotional level at the beginning of the scene vs. the end. "There should be a step-by-step change in the character from, say, cool to fearful, spiteful to forgiving, cruel to compassionate, or the like, in every scene. If there is conflict but no change, you have a static conflict."

Static conflict is bad. It means conflict without character growth. For example, two kids arguing over the television remote will have conflict but are unlikely to grow and change as a result of it. He also cautions against melodrama or jumping conflict, where the characters change but their motivations are off. You have intensity but no motivation.

"If the characters change emotionally a little at a time as a result of the conflict, you know the conflict is rising steadily, as it should."

So go out there and make sure you've got lots of conflict in EVERY scene, that it's slowly rising to show your reader the character's emotional growth, and always make certain you have an emotional change from the beginning of EACH scene compared to the end.

Incorporating these tips will make your scenes absolutely ripple with conflict--the right kind, that is!

Pearls from Cathy Maxwell

Avon Historical and New York Times Bestselling author Cathy Maxwell stopped at the Parma Snow branch of the Cuyahoga County Public Library the other night for a chat. She's been writing for over twenty years and has a new release just out, Lyon's Bride (see gorgeous cover below).

The beauty of hearing an expert speak is that it makes you see things in a unique way--a way that comes from years of experience. I often feel I have a myopic view of things and long to be able to pull back and see the big picture.

Here is what she said that had a great impact on me:

A romance is the tale of a relationship but also of a commitment. We read to see if this couple has what it takes to commit to one another for life.

I love that! It's a beautiful perspective on why we read--and write--romance.

A romance begins with a woman who doesn't like the status quo and has decided to take a risk.

What a great way to describe the Call to Adventure!

Someone asked her about sex scenes in books. Cathy said that for a female, sex is the ultimate act of commitment. If the reader doesn't sense that commitment, the scene will fall flat or appear gratuitous.

Writing a novel is like working with a lump of clay. A good book is in the rewrites.

I am currently working from a fast draft and tortuously trying to turn it into a real story and finding it agonizing. I know it will need more drafting--but how much more? How much more time, how many more drafts? When does it turn from the lump of clay into something bigger than itself, a real story?   Will I ever get it right? 

(So, as you can see, I'm having some stress here.) So I asked Cathy, do you write faster now than you used to?  How many hours a day do you write?

Her answer was, it never gets easier. Some books write themselves easier than others and she has no idea why. But she did say, you're always best when you push yourself. You always have to keep challenging yourself to be better.

Cathy said the second book in her new series (the Chatten curse series) that is coming out in the fall (Harry's story) may be her favorite hero ever. I can't wait to read this series.

Cathy's also got a story in an anthology coming out on May 28th (just in time for Memorial Day) by Avon Impulse called For Love and Honor. The authors were given a one-word prompt:  Soldier. Her story is the Regency version. Lynne Hinton and Candis Terry tell contemporary tales.

I'm so glad I had the opportunity to listen (and be energized by) the words--and wisdom--of a true expert.


                                                              

An Entry That Sparkles

Recently, I've judged a few contests and I've finaled in a few.  And I have until Sunday to revise an entry any way I want before I turn it in again for the final judging.

All this leads me to think and think hard--what exactly makes a great entry?


As I ran down the list of this week's talented Golden Heart winners, I saw some finalists who had finaled previously.  What precisely do these talented folks know??? Is there an elusive secret that makes a person final again and again?  If anyone knows what it is, please don't hesitate to come forth and tell me!!!  Bottle it and I'll pay!!!

So anyway, all bitterness aside (I'm over it, I really am :), I decided to compile a list to help me revise my entry and focus on making it the best I can.

MIRANDA'S LIST:  ****WHAT MAKES A CONTEST ENTRY SPARKLE**** 

• Vivid, larger-than-life characters.  Characters with personality.  Sympathetic, believable, realistic and yet...more.  ***Something,*** whatever that might be (that secret spice) that pulls them out of being ho-hum ordinary.  Something that makes you care immediately what happens to them when point #2 happens. So call this high concept, call it the hook, call it that extra special unique twist on the ordinary, whatever you call it, it makes you say, Oh! I want to read that!  This is not a hum-drum victim, this is not a sit-back-and-watch-things-happen-to-me heroine, this is an active, goal-directed character who is going to fight back (maybe not in the right way) when things go wrong.

• Their world as they know it turns upside down.  In the first chapter.  And we don't need to know every reason why, yet, either.  But we care.  Save the info dumps for your own notes.  Take them out, all out, and leave in all the action and dialogue you can.

• An unusual, vivid setting.  A place you as a reader want to visit.  Even if it's grandma's kitchen--you want to be there.  There is something new and different about it--a new world to explore.  Yes, I said a new world.  That's for anybody who thinks paranormal is the only genre with world building.

• Every voice is distinct and you can actually hear each character talk in your head.  An author who is able to do this has done her/his homework about their characters.  They've given them traits that come out every time they open their mouths to speak.

• The dialogue sparkles.  That doesn't mean it has to be full of one-liners.  But it's so real you can hear it in your head.

• The author has a strong voice.  I understand this when I see it but I don't know if I have it in my own writing.  Can voce be inhibited and written out of your work the more you rework things?  Can it be inhibited by perfectionism, by trying to get things exactly right?  If you write your first draft fast, do you get more "voice" into it?  Or does this get honed in your final drafts?  I can't answer this.

• The language is colorful and surprising.  I'm going to show not tell by using a few examples from  Lisa Kleypas's new release, Rainshadow Road.  She is an absolute master at this.

         Here she is describing a little girl:
         "She weighed no more than a dandelion fluff, her small arms loosely wrapped around his           
         forehead."  (p. 96)

         The idea of relating the weight of a dandelion fluff to a little girl is so brilliant, and the small arms  
         wrapped around this big man's head--for anyone who has ever seen a little girl riding high on
          someone's shoulders, it's just perfect. 

          More unexpected metaphors:

          "The scene scattered like an overturned display of greeting cards."  (page 141)

         "Lucy had not been able to identify the nagging feeling that had drawn her insdes as tight as
          violin strings."  (page 5)

          And here is a description of an inanimate object, a house:  "Even in its ruined condition, the house 
          possessed winsome charm.  Unknown stories lingered in abandoned corners and rickety
          staircases.  Memories had seeped into its walls."  (page 35)

          Memories don't usually seep, but in this case it is just the perfect unusual metaphor. 

          Good authors know how to mold language in unique ways that surprise the reader. 

• Lastly, what's not in a sparkling entry?  Backstory, lots of introspection, little action, dull and commonplace characters who do dull and commonplace things.  We are in the entertainment industry.  I think that's important to keep in mind as you write the story of your heart.  It's not all about you and what you feel compelled to put on the page--it's about your audience. 

           Okay, I'm goin' back to the drawing board!  Wish me luck.

Emotion Belongs Somewhere Else Besides in Your Manuscript: An Exercise

Take a look at the following words:

doomed
shattered
unforgettable
coldly
devastating
attraction
ferocious
overwhelming pleasure
peril
mistrust
desire
incipient hope
painful
new

What do you notice about there words?  Most are adjectives.  Some are nouns.  One is an adverb.

Okay, go deeper--what do you feel about these words?  Does reading down the list make your heart beat a little faster?  Does it cause you to imagine something, well--exciting?  Does it make you wonder how all these words fit together?

Is this the kind of book you'd like to be reading right now?

Romance writers--is this the kind of book you'd like to be writing right now?!

Okay, now click here for the source.  It is the amazing author Sherry Thomas's query letter (on Pub Rants, literary agent Kristin Nelson's blog)  for what eventually became Private Arrangements, the smashing debut that put her on the map.

I was reading through all the outstanding query letters listed on Ms. Nelson's blog, trying to figure out what makes them outstanding.  And of course it's many things.  But what I realized is that presenting your fabulous story idea isn't enough for a query.  You have to present it emotionally.  When you read the common advice, use the same tone in your query as your manuscript, this may be (at least in part) what that means. 

Readers buy for the emotional experience.  (After all, we're not writing textbooks, are we?)  So agents are looking for that, too.  It's a hard task to distill a 350-page book into a one-page query letter, and it's even harder to do it with feeling, enthusiasm, and excitement.  But forgetting to convey the reasons you wrote the story in the first place is like leaving the sugar out of the sugar cookie batter.  (Sorry, I had to get a holiday analogy in there somewhere :)

Happy Holidays, Everyone!

 

Want to write for Mills and Boon? Read This!

A few weeks ago I told you the Mills and Boon first chapter competition topped out at 1090 entries.  Well, today they announced the winner, Natalie Charles, for her story The Seven Day Target.  Check out her story here 

For the rest of us who didn't final:  the Mills and Boon editors selected 20 random first chapters and wrote up very short and helpful critiques on each.  They are posted in four batches of five here (On the website romanceisnotdead.com, select the dropdown "News.")

This is a wonderful opportunity to read some interesting entries and understand what these editors are looking for.  

Nothing like learning by example! Check it out!

Rubies Discuss GH Tips

Well, my first page was not one of the 4 finalists on the Ruby Sisters blog last week but if you haven't already, go and read the wonderfully creative ones that did final.  This little contest underscored the importance of the first line and the first page of your manuscript.  From now till October 13th, the Rubies are posting the first pages of their GH-winning manuscripts and offering tips about making your first page GH-worthy.  Best of all they are doing it by GH category.  Find all this great stuff at http://www.rubyslipperedsisterhood.com/  

Fun with the Rubies Today

Are you polishing up your manuscript for the RWA's Golden Heart contest?  Pop on over to The Ruby Slippered Sisterhood today to check out the finalists in their First Line contest.  The Rubies (who are the 2009 Golden Heart winners) took 100 first-line entries and voted to choose 11 favorites.  Those 11 will submit the first 250 words of their manuscripts today on the blog (up till midnight tonight).

So does your manuscript begin with description?  Maybe of the setting?  Well, take a look at these lines and they will encourage you to look at your ms again and come up with a snappy, clever first-line hook to draw your reader in. 

Oh, and BTW, I'm one of the finalists! :)

Keeping the Reader in the Story--Advice from Susan Elizabeth Phillips at RWA 2011

[Today I thought I'd share with you an article I wrote for the July issue of my local chapter newsletter.]  [Wasn't Nationals fun?!]

Susan Elizabeth Phillips, bestselling author of contemporary romance, gave a talk to a packed room at RWA Nationals on “Writing the Bestseller:  Six Magic Words.”  She was highly entertaining and hilarious and packed a wealth of knowledge into this talk.  

What makes a great read so compelling the reader can’t put it down?  Either the plot is so riveting, or you care about the characters so much you can’t stop reading, or the author is showing you something you’ve never seen before. 

Susan cautioned that writing a compelling book is not the same as writing the perfect book, which she defined as a book where you follow all the rules.

You’ve got to KEEP THE READER IN THE STORY (those are the six magic words).  Anything that pulls the reader out—DON’T DO.  So here are FOUR tips to keep the reader in the story:

1.  Work to master good craft.

Lack of mastery of grammar, use of repetitive words, awkward sentence structure, and clunky use of research will lose your reader.  She is not a purist about POV shifts but if the reader notices, shame on you.  Master your craft before you break the rules.

She gives herself permission to “put garbage on the screen,” knowing at some point she’s going to have to go back and correct a lot of things.  If you’re a perfectionist, leave your perfectionism behind!

2.  Keep the reader in the story by creating dazzling characters, ones we cannot bear to be parted from.  You want to get an emotional reaction from your reader.  This means that your characters are sympathetic BUT NOT PERFECT.  You can give your characters lots of flaws if you keep their heart pure.  Characters in popular fiction should be realistic but still LARGER THAN LIFE.  (Susan got a huge laugh when she joked that this is unlike literary fiction, which mimics life—“which is why it’s so damn boring.”)

Characters must have well-motivated actions.  Don’t sacrifice character just to move your plot forward.  Rather, keep your plot moving forward by giving your characters strengths and weaknesses.  Let your characters grow throughout the story so that by the end, they are able to do something that they couldn’t at the beginning.

Give them strong individual voices.  Nail each scene emotionally.  When you’re done, go back and read only the scenes with the heroine in them all the way to the end—then go back and do this for the hero.  Then you will be able to chart their relationship and their relationship with all the other characters in every scene.

3. Create a fast-moving plot.  It’s easy—just LEAVE OUT THE BORING PARTS.  You can write them, just cut them out before the end.  This means backstory, research, any character staring out the window, too much internal dialogue, etc.  Weave in backstory as seamlessly as possible and in bits and pieces.

End chapters on a cliffhanger.  If the scene has a resolution that would make the reader stop and go to bed, bury it in the middle of the chapter.

 

Subplots should begin after the main story and end before it.  If the main plot runs out of steam, she switches to the subplot to mix it up.

Raise stakes as high as possible.  She takes out a yellow pad and writes AND THEN THINGS GET WORSE and then brainstorms all the possibilities, writing down anything and everything that comes to mind.

4.  Keep the reader in the story by writing to your strengths, not just the market.  Feedback from readers can help identify your strengths.  Use critique groups carefully.  She has found that being critiqued while she is in process doesn’t work for her—so she waits until she has a finished product to share.  She said you do what you have to do to produce and you have to get tough about protecting your work.  So you have to find the method that works best for you.  

This was a great talk—the best I heard at Nationals.  If you get a chance to listen to it when the disc comes out, I highly recommend it.  Oh, and if you haven't already, you can find Susan Elizabeth Phillips at susanephillips.com.

Learning to Write Fast

I am lucky to be in a course on SavvyAuthors run by Lori Wilde.  It is a Fast Track Novel Writing Class that goes for six months.  It's wonderful, and Lori is a great teacher.  That being said, the agony is that every day, five days a week, each of us has to turn in 1500 words of writing.  If you do the math, that's about six (ds) pages per day, 7500 words a week.  If you are short or miss a day, you've got to make it up by week's end.  We signed a pact.  Produce or else!

This is terrifying to me.  In order to do this, you've got to be able to do several things.  The first is, you have to have a plot for your book!  You've got to know where you are headed to be able to crank out 6 pages a day!  No fa-la-la-ing around, no I-think-I'll-start-in-a-different-place today, or I-think-I'll-take-a-day-for-research.   Biggest fear:  what if my brain is too little to wrap itself around such a big plot?  My plot seems bigger than my brain right now!

I read on Lauren Willig's website that she generally stays about 5 chapters ahead on her outline, and has a general outline to guide her, even though things may change as the characters behave outside the lines.  Five chapters ahead!  Egads, I'm a paragraph ahead!

You need to leave the perfectionism behind.   This is by far the most difficult thing for me.  The first few days last week, I had difficulty even turning the pages in, even though only my class can see them and surely no one cares.  But they're awful!  Did I actually let the hero say that?  It's ridiculous!  How to turn off that nasty internal editor long enough to turn my homework in?  (Must close eyes and hit send button before one can criticize onself.)

Lastly, you need the research to be done.  My book takes place in 1832 London, really after the Regency period.   I've never written beyond the Regency, and I've never done a romance with a lot of historical intrigue.   But how do I research when I can't even get my homework turned in?

I'm happy to say I did make my word count last week, despite being on the road for 3 days and having kids home all week.  I really hope I can do this, because what Lori is teaching us is how to write like a real author.  It's not enough to BICHOK all day--I've got that part down.  This is where you roll up your sleeves, research, create, produce, and crank. 

I know that completing this course will take my writing to a new level...if I survive it!

The Surprise Factor in Fiction

Had a big family event this weekend at my house that required a lot of preparation, so yesterday I gave myself permission to vege out, enjoy the 80+ degee weather (yes, even in Cleveland, it appears spring has arrived (and I say that with a great deal of caution)!), and dig into Brava, Valentine, Adriana Trigiani's continuation of Valentine Roncalli's trials and tribulations.

I mentioned before how much Trigiani's language gets to me--it's sensory and bold.  But even moreso, it surprises.  I really believe that this is one of the marks of experienced authors--they know how to make you sit up and say wow!  how did she ever think of that?  

In these two books, I see the surprise factor on two levels--one is in the descriptions of things--the metaphors are so fresh and startling.  (No cliches here, no siree!)   But also in the plot.  It reminds me of the Donald Maass workbook, when he asks questions like, what could these characters possibly do to create MORE conflict, MORE tension?  And as a reader, I think, OMG, she actually did that?!  I can't believe it!  It makes it impossible to stop reading.

Of course, this is women's fiction.  In a romance novel, the female would share her lead role with a man, and there would be much less introspection and description.  But the external (plot-driven) journey and emotional jouney of the woman and her subsequent empowerment as a result of that journey are front and center in both genres.

And I really believe that the surprises are key in any good book. 

At this point in my career, I judge a book by how much it can pull me out of "analysis" mode and into the story where I forget that I am a writer--I forget who I am and where I am--I dissolve into the story. 

That is why I love to read.  And write.

Okay, back to work.  I hope my house can stay clean for just one more day--it's already starting to go around the edges...

Help for Writing in the First Person...from Wendy LaCapra

I've recently been called upon to read a friend's partial manuscript--all written in the first person.

I recently wrote a short story in the first person, which I had never seriously done before.

And I realized there are pitfalls.

The hardest one for me was the "telling" pitfall.  How on earth do you avoid telling if you are writing "I"?  I mean, isn't using "I," by its very nature, telling?

Well, there are ways, and aspiring author Wendy LaCapra taught them to me.  Following are a few examples from my story and how Wendy helped me make them a LOT bolder, better, and more-showy-and-less-tell-y:

EXAMPLE 1

Telling:  "It was no wonder I acted as if I had received Willy Wonka's Golden Ticket."

Wendy's Way:  "I clutched it (the ticket) to my chest like it was Willy Wonka's Golden Ticket."

Do you see what she's done here?  She's made it visual.  Using the strong verb "clutched" makes you visualize clutching a precious object to your chest.  You can see it.  And therefore you can feel it.

EXAMPLE 2

Telling:  I had grown up, and left my hurtful penchant for bad boys in the past.

Wendy's Way:  The day he slipped an engagemnet ring on my finger, I knew I had grown up and left my hurtful penchant for bad boys in the past.

Why it works:  A vivid, concrete image your brain can sink its teeth into.

EXAMPLE 3

More (yawn) telling:  She had stopped by my tiny shoebox of an office to make dinner plans.

Wendy's Way:  She tried to lean across my cluttered desk without causing the stacks of books and papers to fall.

Same thing, the telling is changed to SENSORY images.  You can do this using any sense.  Use all five!

EXAMPLE 4

Telling:  Well, my thesis had been Jane Austen:  The Woman's Woman.  But had anyone outside of my small liberal arts English department even read it?

Wendy's Way:   "You do recall my thesis was Jane Austen:  The Woman's Woman."  But had anyone outside of my small liberal arts English department even read it?

See the conversion of telling to dialogue?

BOTTOM LINE:  Enhance your first-person writing by changing dull telling by injecting emotional and sensory images.  And use dialogue instead of telling, too.

Thank you, Wendy!  I think you're brilliant!  :)

Brain Fatigue and Maturing Your Manuscript

I really hate brain fatigue.  The kind that prevents you from seeing mistakes.  When you work on a manuscript day in and day out, you are bound to get it.  Here are the top three annoying mistakes I often make and then catch only after I've had a rest from a manuscript:

--I use the same words, especially verbs and adjectives, over and over, within a short space of one another.   Don't know why, just happens.  Seems like it happens more with the more unusual words--like my brain thinks they are clever and wants to keep using them.

--I lose my ear for good dialogue.  Even if I think it's good at the time, it doesn't sound so good later.

--I sacrifice emotional depth to plot.  I think it's all I can do to get the plot down the first couple of go-rounds.   Have to really think and make connections and layer in emotional conflict as time goes on.

These are all reasons why writing is not a solitary profession after all.  I used to think it was.  But connections are made and ideas are grown when work is shared...not to mention, mistakes are fixed!

I entered my newest manuscript into the Golden Heart last fall, but it has "ripened" and changed a lot since then.  Seems like my writing needs this time to be re-thought out and given depth through draft after draft.

I wonder, with experience, do you make less of these errors?  Do you "get it" quicker?

What Leslie Dow Learned from Lori Wilde--a post from Savvy Authors

Aspiring autrhor Leslie Dow did a post on Savvy Authors today about being savvy in the business of writing called "What I Learned from Lori Wilde." Lori offers a write-a-novel-in-six-months class through Savvy U.that Leslie took and enjoyed a lot.

You can read Leslie's full post at Savvy Authors here.

Pearls from this post follow.  Lori says, "Your writing is neither as bad as you fear nor as good as you hope."  The truth is likely somewhere in between and can be controlled by hard work and perserverance in honing your craft.  Writing is a businesss in which an author produces a product for the marketplace.  You can produce the finest writing in the world, but if there's no market, you have no sale.   Study and apply techniques from authors who are at the top of their genre.  And network, even if you are the world's greatest introvert.  It takes people besides ourselves sitting day in and out at your keyboard to succeed in this business!

Great tips to remind us that we can't write in a vaccuum.

SEP's Character Description--Why I Think It Works

The reason I think this description (see post from earlier today) is so fantastic is that SEP describes our hero not by looks alone but by his looks as they relate to his personality.
--The heroine assumes there is something about him that proclaims he was not born into blue blood--but had a rough past.
--His hair color is the color of brown between a glass of Bud and a leather portfolio--he's surrounded by leather in his office, the glass of Bud she can picture him enjoying
--The other comments pertain to the obvious level of success he's attained, the hard work he does and his passion for it.

A description like this would never be possible on a first draft (at least for me).  You really have to know your character spot on to do such a concise description like this!

How to Describe Your Hero (the Susan Elizabeth Phillips Way)

I've been doing a lot of judging lately--for the GH, for my local chapter contest.  And a lot of editing on my own manuscript. 

Here's what I'm noticing:  a lot of writers, myself included, prefer dark haired heros with dark eyes.

After a while, how sick can you get of describing ebony, black as night, jet black, dark, brown, mysterious, black as midnight, exotic--you know what I mean.   Seems like you just drain yourself (and thesaurus.com) of words to describe your hero's dazzling, ever-changing hair and eyes as you're writing him through the 300+ pages of your manuscript.  

But then I read this.  This passage is taken from page 7 of Match Me If You Can by Susan Elizabeth Phillips.  What follows is the very first description of the hero, Heath Champion, also known as The Python, through the eyes of the heroine Annabelle Granger, who is just taking over her grandmother's matchmaking business.  He does sports PR at the highest level--the same job as Jerry MacGuire.  She first sees him sitting behind the desk in his very high-end office:

(I had to take a deep breath and stop reading after this paragraph.  It just bowled me over!)

"He was square-jawed and tough, everything about him proclaiming a brash, self-made man--a roughneck who'd flunked charm school the first couple of times around but had finally gotten it right on the third pass.  His hair was thick and crisp, its rich color a cross between a leather portfolio and a bottle of Bud.  He had a straight, confident nose and bold dark eyebrows, one of which was bisected near the end with a thin pale scar.  The firm set of his well-molded mouth proclaimed the low tolerance for fools, a passion for hard work that bordered on obsession, and possibly--although this might be her imagination--a determination to own a small chalet near St. Tropex before he was fifty.  If it weren't for a vague irregularity to his features, he would have been unbearably gorgeous.  Instead, he was merely drop-dead good-looking.  What did a man like this need with a matchmaker?"

Susan Elizabeth Phillips, Match Me If You Can

Writing like this is why SEP is a goddess!

What makes this different--what makes it stand-out writing?
(I'm going to come back later and tell you why I love this so much.)